Giving Up Kumquats and Other Major Sacrifices

My girlfriend gets a few “this is how your baby is progressing” email updates from various websites (thebump.com, etc). She keeps most of this information to herself, but one thing she shares with me every week is the current size of our baby. In week four, she told me that our baby was the size of a poppy seed. Week five, it was a sesame seed. Week 6… well, here’s the list.

• 4 weeks – poppy seed
• 5 weeks – sesame seed
• 6 weeks – lentil
• 7 weeks – blueberry
• 8 weeks – kidney bean
• 9 weeks – grape
• 10 weeks – kumquat
• 11 weeks – fig
• 12 weeks – lime

Take a close look at that list. Sure, it’s interesting to see how rapidly the fetus grows and it’s nice to have real world size references, but why not a dime, a marble or a ping pong ball? Why does it have to be food? If you spend seven days thinking about your baby as being a poppy seed, you better believe you’re not eating poppy seed muffins for a while. As a result, I’ve got a list of foods that make me ill to think about eating. My girlfriend has had to give up deli meat, shellfish and wine because of pregnancy, but I’ve been forced to give up poppy seeds, blueberries and grapes because they make me think about eating a human baby. And who knows how many other food items show up in the weeks ahead. I might as well give up cantaloupes and whole turkeys now just so I can get a jump on things. Don’t let anyone tell you that men don’t make sacrifices during pregnancy, because I assure you, a life without kumquats isn’t much of a life at all.

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